WEB SITE TERMS OF USE

Wow! You actually came to this page. Our lawyers made us
include it and made us use a precious button on our home
page to get you here. At first, we thought the lawyers were
a real pain. But then we read the page. What a Netwakening!
It's really important stuff. We took the legalese the
lawyers wrote and translated it into readable English. So
be a smart nethead and read the stuff on this page. It
could prevent you from hearing from our lawyers, or worse
yet, from really nasty people, like prosecutors.

Here's the deal:

We run this site so that people like you (and people you
like) can use it for personal entertainment, information,
education, communication, and cybergratification. So go
ahead and browse around all you like. You can even download
stuff from the site but only for non-commercial, personal
use. If you do, though, don't fool around with the
copyright and other notices all over the stuff. They're
there for a really good reason. And don't even think about
distributing, modifying, transmitting, reusing, re-posting,
or anything else uncool with any of the stuff, including
the text, images, audio, and video, for public or
commercial purposes unless we give you written permission.
And it's not likely we will.

If you visit our site, you're also legally obligated to
[read: stuck with] the terms and conditions listed below
and any other law or regulation that applies to the site,
the Internet, the World Wide Web, or Los Angeles, CA. You
shouldn't access or browse the site if you have any problem
with that, because once you start, there's no turning back
-- you are bound by [read: stuck with] the terms and
conditions.

So here's the scoop on our Top Ten Rules for Cybersurfers
who hang out on our site:

1.      For everyone's sake, just assume that everything on
the site is copyrighted unless we say it's not. So you
can't use the stuff except how we say you can on this page
or anywhere else on the site without our written
permission. And like we said before, it's not likely we'll
give you permission anyway. In fact, even if we wanted to,
the lawyers are likely to veto any deal anyway. So it's
better you don't even ask.

2.      While we try to include accurate stuff on the site,
we're not promising you it's accurate. In fact, we're not
promising you anything except fun and entertainment. So if
you use stuff on the site, you're using it at your own
risk. Don't call us if there's a problem because we assume
no liability or responsibility for errors or omissions on
the site.

3.      We and anybody else who helped us create, produce,
or deliver the site are not liable for any damages you
suffer when you use it. In particular, the lawyers want you
to know that our disclaimer includes "direct, incidental,
consequential, indirect, or punitive damages arising out of
your access to, or use of, the site. Without limiting the
foregoing, everything on the site is provided to you 'AS
IS' WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESSED OR
IMPLIED, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED
WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR
PURPOSE, OR NON INFRINGEMENT.

Please note that some jurisdictions may not allow the
exclusion of implied warranties, so some of the above
exclusions may not apply to you. Check your local laws for
any restrictions or limitations regarding the exclusion of
implied warranties. " Ugh! What a mouthful from the
mouthpieces. We put all of that in quotes because we
couldn't figure out any other way to say it that the
lawyers would accept. But here's the bottom line -- we're
not responsible if you're browsing around and the site
damages you or your computer or infects it with any nasty
viruses. We sure hope that doesn't happen, but if it does,
don't call us.

4.      If you don't want the world to know something,
don't post in on the site in any bulletin board or anyplace
else. That's because anything you disclose to us is ours.
That's right -- ours. So we can do anything we want with
the stuff you post. We can reproduce it, disclose it,
transmit it, publish it, broadcast it, and post it
someplace else. We can even send it to your mother (as soon
as we find her address). Not only that, we can even use any
ideas, concepts, know-how, or techniques you post any way
we want to, including, developing, manufacturing and
marketing products or other stuff using the information you
post.

5.      Pictures of people or places shown on the site are
either our property or someone else's property we're using
with their permission. No matter what, it's definitely not
your property. You or any of your net-friends can't use it
unless we said you could on this page or somewhere else on
the site. And guess what -- we won't say yes. So be
careful, Bunky, because unauthorized use may violate all
sorts of nasty laws. Be smart, keep the stuff you download
to yourself.

6.      There's also a lot of trademarks, logos, and
service marks on the site that either we own or we're using
with someone else's permission. So don't think you have any
kind of license or right to use them, because you don't and
we're not about to give you one. If you don't leave them
alone and mess with our trademarks, logos and service marks
on our site, we'll probably go ballistic, so will the
companies that own the other trademarks, logos and service
marks. That means that we're likely to sue you or to ask a
prosecutor to come after you for messing around with our
property or the property of others.

7.      You'll probably notice we've linked our site to
lots of others. While that's cool, it doesn't mean we've
looked at all those sites, much less checked them out
periodically to see what's going on. So don't blame us if
some site you link to is bad or has stuff on it that
offends you or your pets. Go ahead and link, but remember,
you're doing it at your risk.

8.      That brings us to what you do on our own site.
While we occasionally listen in on chat groups, or look at
the posting in our discussion groups or on our bulletin
boards, we take no responsibility and assume no liability
for the content of those locations or for any mistakes,
defamation, libel, slander, omissions, falsehoods,
obscenity, pornography, or profanity you might encounter
when you visit such places on our site. And don't be stupid
by posting or transmitting any unlawful, threatening,
libelous, defamatory, obscene, scandalous, inflammatory,
pornographic, nasty, mean, or profane material or any
material that law enforcement types may consider a criminal
offense, get someone in court on a civil lawsuit, or for
that matter violate any law -- anywhere, anytime. While we
certainly respect your privacy, we have no choice but to
fully cooperate with any law enforcement authorities or
court which might ask us who might have posted nasty stuff
on our site.

9.      Software that we use on this Site is protected by
all sorts of patriotic U.S. laws. Because of that, you
can't download or send the software to anyone in the
vacation travel spots of Cuba, Iraq, Libya, North Korea,
Iran, Syria, or any other country where United States has
embargoed goods; or (get this) to anyone on the United
States Treasury Department's list of Specially Designated
Nationals, the U.S. Commerce Department's Table of Deny
Orders, or the FBI's Most Wanted Internet Creeps List (just
kidding on the last one). As if that were not tough enough,
if you live in or are a national of any of those lovely
places, you're not even supposed to be reading this page,
so beat it!

10.     We're also allowed to change this page and anything
else on the site any time we want to. That's because it's
ours and we have the programmers who can do it. If we do
change the page, then you're bound by [read: stuck with]
those changes, too, whenever you visit our site.

11.       If either of us wants to make something of it and
wants to “sue” (a dirty word) then we have to follow these
rules of engagement. (sort of according to the Geneva
Convention):

This Agreement is governed by the laws of the State of
Tennessee, without regard to principles of conflict of laws.

To the extent you have in any manner violated or threatened
to violate Single Lives.comand/or its affiliates'
intellectual property rights, Single Lives.comand/or its
affiliates may seek injunctive or other appropriate relief
 in any state or federal court in the State of Tennessee,
and you consent to exclusive jurisdiction and venue in such
courts.

Any other disputes will be resolved as follows:

If a dispute arises under this agreement, we agree to first
try to resolve it with the help of a mutually agreed-upon
mediator in the following location: Carrol. Any costs and
fees other than attorney fees associated with the mediation
will be shared equally by each of us.

If it proves impossible to arrive at a mutually
satisfactory solution through mediation, we agree to submit
the dispute to binding arbitration at the following
location: Mckenzie, Tn., under the rules of the American
Arbitration Association. Judgment upon the award rendered
by the arbitration may be entered in any court with
jurisdiction to do so.

If this all sounds kind of mean and undiplomatic, you
should have seen what the lawyers gave to us in the first
place. We had to remind them that human torture and
sacrifice was outlawed in the United States. Boy, did they
look disappointed!

November 19 2009

Single Lives.com

This Legal Document Was Produced Using AutoWebLaw